Traditionally, families were expected to be composed of two parents and one or more children. Over the years, huge numbers of people have tried to maintain this dynamic in their family lives at whatever cost necessary. This can often prove to be extremely problematic.
While two people may be able to make a child, it doesn’t necessarily mean that living together in order to raise the child is necessarily what’s best for everyone involved. Sometimes, “staying together for the kids” isn’t actually a healthy or wise choice for anyone in the family unit. Here’s a little more information on the subject!
Problems with Staying in a Difficult Relationship
There are various reasons that a relationship might not work out. Perhaps you and your child’s other parent weren’t actually ever together to start with. Maybe you were together but things have changed and you are no longer compatible. There may have been infidelity or other problems in your relationship.
If you find that you and your partner are simply unhappy together, cannot patch things up, and the only reason that you are trying to continue in the relationship is “for the sake of the child”, you might not be making a wise choice. Children are sensitive and pick up on problems easily. Potential problems with staying in a difficult relationship include:
- Your child witnessing arguments and conflict regularly
- Your child growing up in a hostile environment
- Your child misinterpreting concepts of healthy love and relationships
Many people worry that if they split up with their partner, they will have to sacrifice their relationship with their child. This isn’t true. If you are a good parent, you will be entitled to split custody. You and your partner can share quality time with your child separately. If any problems arise, you should contact a father’s rights advocacy group.
There are plenty of benefits to raising your children in a split custody scenario. Your children get to spend quality time with each of their parents without having to dwell in a hostile environment where every discussion ends in an argument. They will also understand that as they grow up they themselves should only engage with relationships that they are happy and comfortable within.
Everything is likely to be more positive. It also frees up your time and attention to focus on them, rather than focusing on problems in your own relationship. All round, it tends to be a win win situation in which everyone can move on from negativity.
As you can see, “staying together for the kids” isn’t always the best way to go about things. There are alternatives out there that can prove a whole lot more beneficial for everyone involved. So, take this into consideration should your relationship enter irrecoverably rocky territory.
Josh – Contributing Author